Posted: Friday, April 23, 2010 by Greg in

Just because the timing could not have been any more perfect from my last post:

Came home to one of my roommates, Whitey McNotblack, taking a girl back to the BatLoft. I am actually friends with this girl from back in Boston, which makes the situation all the more amusing. We hadn't seen each other for some time, so we did the quintessential 'omg, how you been, no way, roflcopter' thing. Then, however, the first thing he proceeds to tell me is that he "just got done telling her I would kick her ass at Mario Kart." Serious face, back again.

Ok, for the most part it seems my most regular readers on here happen to be girls (who kick ass) so I'm just throwing this out there: if a guy's pick-up game involved HIS ROOMMATE'S MARIO KART SKILLS, would you really hit that? Honestly? I would expect such antics to land me a one-way ticket on the NotLaid Express. And that train is never late.

Anyway, the Kart results were inevitable. Toad proceeded to commit 64-bit genocide on all things in his path. As per whether it landed him any, that has yet to be determined. But based on the fact that SouthPark is now their show-of-choice for couch-canoodling, I can expect this to go about as far as Emily's Reasons Why Not*.

But seriously, girls who read this, please. Tell me I'm not crazy.

*That reference might have been too obscure. That show was cancelled after one episode. Get it now? I'm saying she probably won't touch his penis. Glad we're on the same page.


  1. Oh, but you are... ;)

  1. Some girls are anomalies. And some just say they are. But a Mario Kart skill test as a precursor to a little romping is a good test to find out.

    I'd hit it. But I'm pretty into video games and all things nerd, so maybe that doesn't help you out that much.

  1. Greg says:

    If we was talkin about HIS kart skills, yeah I'd agree it could work. But I have never considered the "yo check how ill my boy is" approach at doing work on my own behalf.

  1. *Trisha* says:
    This comment has been removed by the author.
  1. *Trisha* says:

    whoa, that was a novel. haha. whoops

  1. If part of a guy's pick-up line was abut his roommate's awesome mario kart skills, I'd be more inclined to try to hit on the roommate.